Is this what Arnold Schwarzenegger had in mind last year when he approached the Humvee’s manufacturer, AM General Corp. of South Bend, Ind., and became the first civilian to buy this successor to the army’s venerable jeep? Must have been, because he’s since bought two more, one of them in red. It got the company thinking, too, and last month it opened a nationwide network of dealers-25 of them, anyway-to market the first battle-tested vehicle since the civilian version of the World War II jeep went on sale in 1946. If you’re the sort of person who wants the cachet of a tank without the expense of reinforcing your garage floor, the Hummer may be for you.
But not for everyone, naturally. The Hummer is everything a $5,000 car shouldn’t be. Wider, higher-at 72 inches, almost as high as it is wide. Slower-it lurches from zero to 60 (close to its top speed of around 65) in just under 20 seconds. Less convenient-to maximize ground clearance (16 inches), engineers put the drive train in the passenger compartment, where it makes a chest-high wall between the passengers. Uglier-well, decide for yourself. But bear in mind the comment of John Stewart, editor of Four Wheeler magazine: “Ugly implies purposeful. Ugly is beautiful.”
Nor is it totally without amenities, as the military version frankly is. These range from the basic (ignition locks, real doors rather than canvas) to the minimally civilized (vinyl bucket seats, nine-speaker stereo, optional air conditioning). But they stop well short of the luxurious (“no French burled-walnut dash,” an AM General spokesman says sternly). Either version will straddle a 40 percent side slope without tipping and negotiate a 60 percent grade, up or down. (The latter, so steep that the driver sees only sky in front of him, is in some ways a more impressive feat.) The truth is that of the 5,000 vehicles the company hopes to sell in the next year, it expects most will go to ranchers, forestry services and others who need a serious, virtually indestructible off-road vehicle. Yet a spokesman boasts that with standard power steering, power brakes and automatic transmission, “your grandmother could drive it to the grocery store.”
Especially if she lives on a mountaintop.
